All About The Bull

jporcenaluk — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 16:28:52 +0000

This would make an incredible Transformer.

So, I’ve been noticing that there are about a billion energy drinks out there. Bawls, Red Bull, Rockstar, Sugar-Free Red Bull, Monster, Red Bull Cola, 5 Hour Energy-technically you drink it, Red Bull Energy Shot, NOS, and Red Bull Sugar-Free Energy Shot (I kid you not). These are just some of the more well-known brands; there are about 106 different kinds of energy drinks listed on Wikipedia. Now, this is no longer one of those coveted “untapped markets”, but if you throw a bunch of chemicals together into a can you can pretty much make your own energy drink and sell it for ridiculous amounts.

Basically, what makes the difference between an “energy drink” and a “soda” is marketing and a few inexpensive ingredents. Considering companies already make a killing on soda, imagine what they are making on energy drinks! I’ll give an example for those with little imagination: the guys who started the company have about $4 billion dollars between them now (their original investment was $1 million). That type of money will give you wiiings.

Of course, you don’t have $1 million, or else you wouldn’t be reading this site. You may have to end up making a suicide drink at your local soda fountain and putting it in canning jars (click here if you have no idea what I mean by suicide drink). Then just stir in some hornet saliva, and your good. Whatever you have to do, you need to get into this market, I mean, I’m sure you are going to at least come up with a better name than “Virus of Beauty.” And who really cares what your drink tastes like, all you have to do is have them try it once for you to get some money. Plus, if your a bit dastardly, you can always add some ingredients that will make sure your customers come back for more.

At least it isn't called "Bacteria of Pulchritude".

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All About The Bull